Build Table For Green Egg

great void is filled with the passing days ...

My friend Chantal who is here with Ludovic Lugansk Arthur and Emily to take today's blog devoted to the huge void that can cause the absence of a child for a woman. as she writes so well, there might be a sister, daughter, step-sister, friend, aunt, niece, step-daughter, even a godmother ... this gap persists and moves. We always try to hide, pretend, ignore it, but it's still there. A huge void! I feel so much what she wrote for her live so intensely. Like her, I waited years ending before that famous bridge empty .. This huge void we have in the belly when man has the best hands and we desire to have children with him but could not. This huge gap is impossible to explain and understand for several even to our spouse, close friends and family. This huge gap that I, like Chantal before arriving here and meet two extraordinary people who will fill. This huge void that I felt ever since I have known Lisa and Andrei ... I invite you to read his post "today. Those who know me well will not probably thinking that I could write it so aptly describes how I felt and how I feel now ... http://espoirdukraine.blogspot.com/2010/09/hier-nous-avons-ete-souper-avec-des.html
My day today was quite exceptional. I am talking about the day with my children because of weather, was the first full day of rain in two months. Truly disgusting. Wet, cool (18-20C) and water everywhere in the streets! I miss almost 42C of the month August!

This morning, I spent my two hour visit with Elisaveta as usual. It was like always happy to see me and kissed me again all the time. It is very funny. As it rains, we stay inside, so she and I are still in the anteroom of his section, a small room of about 120 square feet where the lockers and the wardrobes of all children and a large sofa, stuffed animals, pillows and a few toys.

Here as everywhere in the orphanage, everything has its place. Lisa has her little closet where she kept her shoes and takes his slippers when inside and vice versa when she goes outside. Some clothing found there as well as outerwear: ; tights, hat and coat, etc..

This morning, as usual, she asked me cookies: "Sil Bissski bou please, please bisski if button". I told him I also made a banana. She immediately said: "balal, balal." She loves bananas. As I had no breakfast, I eat half with her and she loved to share with Mom. Subsequently, the small square carton of orange juice (with the little straw into the hole). So cute to see her face when she drinks sink using this straw. Finally, a few small biscuits in the shape of animals. I've tasted them and they are not nearly so sweet is perfect for her.

After playing a few games and have drawn with crayons that I have bought at the market, she took my shoes, and have put me in the feet and chattering telling all sorts of things. She then headed to his closet to fetch her coat and tights. I had to explain that we could not go outside because it was raining. I showed him the rain outside and she seemed to understand. So we continued to play until lunch is served around 12:45. I then left, kissing ... it was sad but she loves to eat, she did not do too and joined the other children at the table. This child and I had a "bonding" Now that almost keeps growing. His confidence also grows every day ... I tested it a lot too. I was happy when I did not hear crying when I left at 13:00 ... last night crying had lasted more than 10 minutes after I left. I could see tears in his section with other children who tried to console without success. I was out and it was already dark. It was therefore easy to see inside the orphanage in his room. I was heartbroken. This morning it was much easier to let ...
At 17:00, I went to Andrei who made Legos in his room with Vladimir (the oldest in the orphanage who is 13 years. This too is absolutely adorable. There are so many children here have a certain age and are absolutely adorable and could be adopted by good parents to help them have a future ... Too many people in America and Europe are unaware that these children could fill them and at the request of Nadia at the agency, I am writing on this subject for publication in the next issue of the News-Letter TDH (our adoption agency).

Andrei has left his Legos to come into the anteroom of his section play with me. There seemed to go a little heart-cons because obviously, I mess around with his friend and his Legos. But ultimately, he brought a dog, a book of maps and SpiderMan SpiderMan collectible.

We spent the 2 most beautiful hours together him and me since the 23 days that I know and see! Slowly, I felt closer to me more and more. We do the horse, played hide and seek and ball, there was tickled, drank juice and ate his fines (he was very happy when I pulled out the small bag I had bought the small store near us. He told me love the fines).

I told him I would go for Lisa but he said "no mom, no Lisa." I understood he wanted to just spend quality time with his mom and so I decided not to pick up Lisa. It is true that when she is there, I have two Seper and Andrei automatically fails. And as I see it exclusively in all morning, I agreed not to pick her up and stay with my son.

So we spent a very pleasant two hours and intense. It's like the beginning of a relationship ... We discovered. This discovery is done with the hands but especially the eyes . I see Andrei is falling in love with her mom and that's really incredible feeling. He looks at me with happiness ... as if he really realized that I really am his mom and really felt as if my love for him. Pure joy!

I decided that for the few days remaining, I see the morning and Andrei Elisaveta afternoon. It'll be better this way for both and for me. My son needs his mother ... there is still little that great!

Tomorrow is the dance that the children have prepared for the Director of the orphanage and the staff. I can not wait. It 13heures and try to take pictures and videos. I have a few practices during preview ... the costumes are truly magical!

Thank you all again for your lovely messages of encouragement ... I REALLY can not wait to be back in Montreal and Eastman! I miss my world and I look forward to introducing children into this new world that will be theirs!

you soon!
xxxx ...

PS. If my calculations are correct, I'll be back in 10 days, 12 hours, 52 minutes and a few seconds. Assuming that I will return Oct. 11. All this will be confirmed at the outset of next week ... I cross my fingers that everything goes well with the rest of paperwork to do.

PS2. If-you-like Maggie, come back home Nancy! I promise you that you always have your place among us and the kids adore you as I adore you! I promise that I will continue to take you to the cottage. You'll always have your place in the center rear seat, this time between the kids! Xxx